"I don't love him," Pyotr says slowly. "It wasn't that kind of --" Not a relationship, more of a -- "Arrangement. But being with him...when we were together, the things he did to me made existence more bearable." There's no shame or embarrassment for him in admitting this; for Pyotr, sex very quickly became a boring and stale cliche, of no interest to him -- until Erik. He is the exception to the rule in so very many ways...and there lies the embarrassment. That this matters so much to him, that he cares. That he...misses it.
"He promised to kill me," he mutters. "But every time we were together, he merely rendered me unconscious instead. Perhaps that seems a small thing to you, something I should even be grateful for. But it's not what I asked for, and he...he agreed. He lied to me. If nothing else, surely you can understand my humiliation. And yet..."
He groans, rubbing his head in frustration. "And yet...the deaths were fake, but the sensations, the emotions they stirred...those were real. I don't know how I am to get by without them."
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Date: 2025-07-10 08:18 pm (UTC)"I don't love him," Pyotr says slowly. "It wasn't that kind of --" Not a relationship, more of a -- "Arrangement. But being with him...when we were together, the things he did to me made existence more bearable." There's no shame or embarrassment for him in admitting this; for Pyotr, sex very quickly became a boring and stale cliche, of no interest to him -- until Erik. He is the exception to the rule in so very many ways...and there lies the embarrassment. That this matters so much to him, that he cares. That he...misses it.
"He promised to kill me," he mutters. "But every time we were together, he merely rendered me unconscious instead. Perhaps that seems a small thing to you, something I should even be grateful for. But it's not what I asked for, and he...he agreed. He lied to me. If nothing else, surely you can understand my humiliation. And yet..."
He groans, rubbing his head in frustration. "And yet...the deaths were fake, but the sensations, the emotions they stirred...those were real. I don't know how I am to get by without them."